Opium Group Privilege Card Gives You the “Privilege” of Getting Scammed In exchange for creating a Bottle Service-opoly on South Beach, The Opium Group offers locals in Dade and Broward counties its “Privilege Card.†Yes, the folks responsible for turning our high-energy mega clubs into overpriced Ultra Lounges – effectively pricing out 98% of residents with its table-and-bottle shtick - has decided to try and make its product a little more appealing. And while this gesture of goodwill to the townies seems like a cool thing to do, it is, in fact, just another line of South Beach BS done to create good PR, while delivering absolutely nothing.
Like a sucker, I applied for the Privilege card when I moved out to South Beach last month. And each week thereafter, I received an email from the Opium Group telling me about all the cool specials I could get if I went to one of its clubs. Cool if, you know, dropping $350 on a Tuesday is your idea of a good time. And, shockingly, 8 weeks after applying for said card it had not yet arrived. No matter, I figured if Opium Group was going to send me the emails telling me to come in, they’d honor the prices they told me. So I had some friends here from out of town who wanted to do a big South Beach Club night. I felt this might be an opportune time to utilize my newfound “Privilege Card,†since I could not think of another time I could justify paying $300 for a bottle that costs $30 at Walgreens. Cameo had sent me an email offering me a bottle of Belvedere and some Rose Champagne for that price. I called the number on the Email, and after roughly 29 rings the girl who answered told me to call the VIP Host. Whose phone did not even ring, instead telling me I’d reached a voicemail that had not been set up. I’m no MBA, but I’m thinking it might be a good idea to have a phone that affords your customers a chance to at least leave a message if you’re trying to run a successful business. But what do I know. I’m not running a club that’s shut down three times since 2006. SHOCKINGLY, CAMEO DOES NOT HONOR ITS OFFERS
Since the VIP host seemed to have this pet peeve about people calling him, I instead called a promoter who said he could get me a reservation utilizing my card. He came recommended, and when I showed up at the club he was there. He ushered me inside, where the girl at the door immediately asked me for my Privilege Card. “You all haven’t mailed it to me yet,†I told her. “I applied two months ago and you haven’t sent it to me. But you do email me, so I thought you would honor the email.†“I have to scan the card,†she told me. “There’s nothing I can do.†“Ok then,†I said. “We’ll go elsewhere.†With that, she went inside, conferred with a manager, and came back out saying they could honor the deal. He just needed an ID and a credit card. Since I was the “host,†like a sucker I again gave them both. We were escorted to our table on what used to be the dance floor of a South Beach megaclub, now converted to a douchebag staging area. Our waitress immediately came over and showed me a menu. I had no use for her menu.
“I have the privilege card, and you all emailed me offering a bottle of vodka and one of champagne for $300. They told me at the door you would do it.†“I need your card,†she shouted over the 9th-tier DJ that was spinning that night. Always good when the door manager can’t be bothered to communicate with the waitress. “He told me they’d do it without it. You emailed it to me, and I was told I could get it.â€
With that she left, and about ten minutes later, as my group sat there antsy, she returned telling me that she needed to scan a card. There was nothing she could do. With that, I asked to see a manager. As we waited for the manager, the mixers showed up. So we sat looking at carafes or Orange Juice like it was late-night drunk time at Denny’s. Except we were losing our buzz faster than the club was losing its appeal. The manager eventually came out, and again, told me I needed a card.
“You emailed me an offer,†I told him, “you really oughta honor it. I live on the Beach, I’m trying to show my guests a good time. You know, to me it just seems like good business to honor an offer you make. If you can’t, I understand. We’ll take our business somewhere else and you can have your table back.†For some reason, he felt he needed to confer with the waitress before giving me an answer. “I can do it,†he said. A collective sigh of relief came up from our party. “But you need to buy two bottles. That’s $600.†“Your offer said 300,†I told him. “Yes, but you need to buy two.†Upon re-reading the email, it said nothing of the sort. But my $30 go-phone didn’t exactly let me confirm this at the time. I told him we would leave then. He seemed a bit flummoxed, then offered to walk us out. He did, returned my card without charging it, and we left. FIVE GUYS: A BETTER TIME AND A BETTER DEAL THAN ANYWHERE OWNED BY THE OPIUM GROUP
Across the street, our friends who had been fighting the Velvet Rope nonsense trying to meet us were at Five Guys. The table they had there cost them about $12.50, and it included all you could drink soda AND a couple burgers and fries. They had also picked up a couple of bottles of liquor, which they were pouring into ketchup containers as makeshift shot glasses. As soon as we walked in, we were all handed a round. We sat at Five Guys and finished out bottles, enjoyed some food, and were actually able to talk. Five Guys VIP, an infinitely better time than it is at Cameo. We laughed, drank, talked, and had a generally phenomenal time without the pressure and pretentiousness of the sad excuse for a nightspot across the street. It was fun, in the purest sense of the word. We adjourned to Ted’s Hideaway on 2nd Street, got another table there, and drank until it closed at 5. I think nobody spent more than $50 the entire night. The moral of the story: Everyone in South Beach associated with a nightclub is full of shit. Even the “legit†people are just trying to lure you in to get you to spend more. If you’re coming here on vacation, I URGE you, ignore the clubs. Leave them for the wannabes and celebrities. The most fun to be had here is in the unlikeliest of places with your closest friends. And by no means, ever, in anywhere owned by The Opium Group.
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28 Comments on"Opium Group Privilege Card Gives You the “Privilege” of Getting Scammed"
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Siobhan says:
I got my card after a month, another friends got his in a week, and third friend doesn’t have his 2 months on…re-apply. When you have it there are no issues and I use mine all the time.
Posted on 10/26/2010 at 12:47 PM