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The City of Miami, FL Compared to Other Cities in the U.S.

Yeah, we have heat, humidity, bugs, traffic, a population with a strange aversion to the English language.
April 29, 2007 By Matt Meltzer in Miami: Travel News  | 75 Comments

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From the Miami Relocation Guide.

Much as I love to spend much of my time, both in this space and on my blog, complaining about Miami, the more I leave, the more I realize what a truly great place it is. Yeah, we have heat, humidity, bugs, traffic, a population with a strange aversion to the English language, and more corruption than a Tijuana Jai-Alai match, but every time you leave you realize everything you take for granted being a resident of the Magic City. There are nonstop sunny days, beautiful people, world class nightlife, recreational opportunities abound, natural scenery and major professional sports. What else could a person ask for?

There are a lot of things Miami lacks. Like a vibrant downtown or a sense of strategic planning. Or a populous that doesn’t all hate each other. But when you think about leaving, the question then becomes “Where?” I have had the opportunity to spend a good amount of time in a good many American cities over my lifetime, mostly in cities that people consider “nice,” or even “livable.” Two words rarely associated with Dade County. But every time I am in one of them I am reminded why Miami is better. And, in no particular order, I will explain to you why.

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San Francisco Bay Area – Maybe if you are John Steinbeck at the turn of the century this place is paradise. Provided you like summer days in the mid-sixties. However, now, while many parts of the Bay Area offer picturesque views of the bay and surrounding hills, there is typically a $25 charge to look at each view. If you want to buy a house, your last name had better be Gates or Jobs. So while the scenery is nice and the people are friendly, what you would pay for a four bedroom house in Miami with a pool might get you a 2/2 in an inhospitable part of Oakland. But at least you are only a short drive to cash your welfare check at the Raiders’ ticket office.

Sacramento – Warmer, cheaper, and completely lacking of anything to do other than drive to San Francisco.

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Atlanta – There is really only one thing about Atlanta that is better than Miami: The Strip Clubs. So unless you are the type of person who likes to spend all night losing money, there is not problem you have in Miami you won’t find in the ATL. Humidity? Imagine Miami’s summers without the payoff of the beautiful winters. Bad sports town? The Braves have won every NL East title since the game was called “rounders” and they still can’t draw over 18,000. Traffic? Drive up 75 at 4 PM on a weekday. The traffic jams start roughly 25 miles outside the city. Racial tension? Let’s not even go there.  If you hate Miami, you will shoot yourself in Atlanta. Although I suppose if you grew up in Birmingham it would be a welcomed change.

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Tampa Bay Area – While certainly slightly more cultured than any Florida City north of it, it is still not exactly Florence on the Gulf. Tampa is sort of like someone from a trailer park that moves to the big city and reinvents herself only to be caught chewing gum at the opera. You can take the city out of North Florida, but you can’t take the North Florida out of the city.

Orlando – See “Sacramento.” Add humidity, bugs, 2 AM closing time, and no breeze. Replace the words “San Francisco” with “Tampa.” You get the idea.

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New York – Okay, so you want nightlife? New York is the only city that rivals Miami. You want great restaurants and professional sports? New York’s got ‘em both. You want to see the sky? Ever? Don’t come to New York. You want to ever feel like you have enough space to stretch your arms without hitting someone in the face? Someone who very likely has some sort of weapon in their pocket? Ignore New York. You want to be able to live somewhere other than a one-bedroom apartment that was converted to a three-bedroom apartment? Stay in Miami. While New York may look like fun, anyone used to the concept of “Personal Space” and “Expendable Income” will be high-tailing it out of the big apple within months. Oh, yeah, and they have this thing up there called “winter,” too.

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Los Angeles – Many like to compare LA to Miami since, you know, we both have palm trees. But that, friends, is where the comparison ends. You think traffic in Miami is bad? Try sitting in it for 40 miles at a time. The entire town is dominated by one industry (much like Washington DC) and if people can’t find a way to make you useful to them, you may as well not even exist. Why you hear people talking nonstop about their “project” with some producer you’ve never heard of. People say the weather is nice, but it is not uncommon to have to walk around in August with a sweater on at night. And have you ever flown into LA? It’s like someone shot a brown fire extinguisher over the entire city and just let it sit there. The air feels like a stagnant pond and in many parts of town it smell like one too. Basically, take everything you hate about Miami, multiply it by six, and subtract everything good as the weather, beaches and nightlife are all about two rungs lower than they are in Dade. All this and no pro football.

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San Diego – So you might say “Well, then why not San Diego? It’s like LA without all that awful stuff.” While its miles of beaches and proximity to Mexico make San Diego attractive, it does to everyone else in America too. So again, if you are selling your house in Miami to move there, you will most likely be living in a one-bedroom condo. If you like the beach, be advised the Pacific Ocean on its warmest day would have you screaming back to your towel if you were in South Beach. 2 AM closing time and an over-abundance of surfers will most likely drive anyone who has ever lived on the east coast - and enjoyed it - packing their bags relatively quickly.

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Washington DC – Unless you have a job working for the US government, you will hate this town. It is, essentially, LA with ugly people. Government dominates the town and you are judged by your position in it. Except instead of pretty aspiring actors and actresses you have a bunch of people trying to be senators. And have you EVER seen a hot senator? Traffic is just as bad as Miami, but again it lacks the weather and nightlife of South Florida. And crime and corruption? Say what you will about Dade, but no one ever caught our mayor smoking crack.

Boston, Philadelphia, Baltimore or any other city in the Northeast and Midwest –You know that storm you got last week that left you without power and dumped like 27 feet of snow and flooded your hometown? That left us with perfect 78 degree days which most of us took off and went to the beach. All these cities have traffic, pollution and rude people just like Miami, but their bars close earlier and there is no beach.

Detroit – If I even have to explain this to you, this article is way above your head.

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Reno – As you drive through the Sierra Nevada mountains in California you see beautiful evergreen trees dabbled with snow in a wondrous mountain landscape. Then you get to Nevada. All of a sudden it is as if someone cut down every tree starting and left nothing but brown hills and cold. Like Cheyenne with casinos. Unless you’re into gambling or Crystal Meth, you won’t find much to do in Reno. Which may lead you to Gambling and Crystal Meth.

Chicago – Many call Chicago a “more-livable New York.” If your idea of livable is sub-zero temperatures for weeks at a time, I suppose that may be true. And even when it does warm up, every year you hear about hundreds of old people dying during heat waves. Funny, Florida is full of heat and old people and you still don’t hear about these mass deaths. Kinda makes you wonder, doesn’t it?

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Seattle – You ever been to Nordstrom? You know how when you walk in everyone is super nice and super polite and you feel like they must all be on Prozac or something? That’s every single person in Seattle. While you may say “Hey, great. What a nice change from everyone-hates-you Miami,” I assure you it gets old after a while. Eventually you want someone to show their frustration and anger and actually make a negative or sarcastic comment once in a while, just to prove they were not all produced by Microsoft and sent onto the streets as robots of politeness. That, and I think it rains once in a while.

Phoenix – Old Indian word meaning “Bigger, hotter Reno.”

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Las Vegas – Okay. So it’s got decent weather. It’s got nightlife, restaurants, new homes and a lot to do. But let’s say you wake up on a sunny 80 degree day and decide it would be a nice day to go lay out at the….dried up river bed? Lest we be blinded by the mirage that is Sin City, you are still in the middle of the freaking desert, folks. The next nearest city is four hours away so once you’ve done what there is to do in Vegas, you are then living in Phoenix without pro sports. And that ain’t a good place to be.

There are a good many more cities that people talk about moving to, but these seem to be the ones always topping the lists. If you live in Miami, and have been here for a while, you probably complain about it as much as I do. But you probably also take a lot of things for granted that other cities do not have and you will find considerably lacking once you get there. The more I leave this place, the more I know that while not perfect, it is still the one city where the bad, no matter how maddening or ridiculous it may be, it always outweighed by the good.

Related Categories: Miami: Travel News,

About the Author: Matt Meltzer is a featured columnist at Miami Beach 411.

See more articles by Matt Meltzer.

See more articles by Matt Meltzer

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75 Comments on

"The City of Miami, FL Compared to Other Cities in the U.S."

Rick says:

If you compare Miami to any other major metro area, I think you’re going to find that, like every other major metro area, it has it’s pluses and minuses.

I think where most people are moving to when they head (voluntarily) out of South Florida are smaller cities and rural areas. North Carolina, Tennessee, Colorado….to name few. And, yes, of course, they all come with their positives and negatives. As does South Florida.

It all comes down to what it is that’s important to you and what you can tolerate. For some, the threat of having your residence being blown to oblivion at any time during 5 months of the year is just a little more than they can tolerate. For them, trading that 5 months for 5 months of cooler temperatures seems reasonable.

Personally, I can’t say I blame them.

.

Posted on 04/29/2007 at 8:57 AM

yep says:

a place where no one speaks english and everyone hates each other… oh yeah, miami is REALLY ideal. miami has the most unhappy, rudest people which even the nice weather and scenery could never compensate for. and the people almost seem proud of it. disgusting.

Posted on 04/29/2007 at 10:30 AM

Freespirit says:

Ha, ha! This was hilarious and very well-researched! I could add Portland, Oregon to the list.  I moved there a while back after seeing it ranked consistently at the top of the most livable cities lists (and because I had a few friends there).  I later realized that these lists of “livable cities”, “most bikable cities”, “most walkable cities”, etc. are all part of a grand conspiracy hatched between local chambers of commerce and whatever magazine or website is trying to get its name in print.  Portland does have that friendly, howdy neighbor veneer like Seattle.  But underneath it, they’re very clannish, uptightly white, condescending toward their arch-enemies, the migrating Californians, paranoid and extremely passive-aggressive.  It’s like Pleasantville in supermarkets and banks, but getting someone to return a greeting there is like trying to get a Stepford wife to cheat on her husband.  And the mistrust there is palpable! Where else can you go to the neighborhood mall (where Tanya Harding used to practice her ice-skating) and find armed security guards following you around Barnes & Noble? I’ve lived in New York, Los Angeles, and New Orleans, and have never seen security scrutinizing my reading habits until I got to Portland.  While tidy and scenic, priding itself in being the “city that works”, it all felt so…anal retentive, so full of porcelain yuppies and so utterly devoid of sensuality and energy.  The sidewalks rolled up by 9 pm.  Rain aside, it’s like the place is running on a dimmer switch.  And those evergreens get a little monotonous after a while.  I’d take the bluntness of Miami any day!

Posted on 05/01/2007 at 6:28 PM

Phillyvaquero says:

Do Austin! Do Austin! Oh….and Gainesville! This is good stuff.  Don’t stop! You’re on a roll!

Posted on 05/01/2007 at 8:30 PM

Blythe says:

This is a hilarious, and frightenly accurate, account of many cities.  I’m considering moving to Miami after being short-term relocated from LA to Orlando and hating it and wondering if I’ll ever live in LA again (description of LA had me dying of laughter, in a very sad way because it is so true), and reading an article comparing Miami to all these cities is exactly what I was hoping to find!  Thank you, excellent reading, excellent candid advice.

Posted on 06/13/2007 at 4:25 PM

Gus says:

Matt, have you ever visited Texas?

flyingman started a Forum topic titled “Considering a job in Miami, but hesitant”. He’s thinking about relocating here from Houston.

He says…

“I must admit that the real estate prices are significantly higher than the Houston area.  Interstingly enough salaries are higher in Houston than Miami but the cost of living is higher in Miami than Houston.  I suppose it is all about quality of life, beaches and the weather.”

I was wondering what your thoughts were about the quality of life in Miami compared to cities like Houston or Dallas?

Posted on 07/01/2007 at 9:30 AM

Matt says:

I spent a night in Dallas once and it is like Alabama meets LA. Lots of people trying to look impressive, and lots or guys with mullets down to their ass. I understand Houston is nasty, and their airport is not as cool as MIA.

Posted on 07/02/2007 at 1:48 PM

Desie says:

your pieces are very informative as i recently moved here sept 2007. just a word od advice, the word ‘populous’ is often misused by you.  It is really the ‘populace’ for what you are writing about.

Posted on 12/08/2007 at 11:36 AM

Desie says:

I also wish to add that I was pleasantly surprised that people actually said “hello” and ‘Good Morning” and hold the elevators for you in Miami.  Not in Washington Dc nor New York where I lived for a total of eight years combined!

Posted on 12/08/2007 at 11:43 AM

Tarz says:

I lived in Miami beach for a year and a half (what a culture shock, white girl from up north), I took complete advantage of the nonstop nightlife! then moved up north cause I thought I missed it. Huge mistake, now I am considering moving to La or back to Miami.. for permanant residence.. your article among opinions reconfirmed me that Miami is home. By far the most magical city!!

Posted on 12/09/2007 at 7:03 PM

Desie says:

The people and the clothes down here look way sexier than up north I might addMy fashion sense has definitely been awakened

Posted on 12/10/2007 at 11:49 PM

Brooklynindahowz says:

I like Miami, almost moved there 20 years ago, but moved to New York instead and I am glad I did. Yeah, the winters suck, kind of like the summers in florida where you get out of the shower and you are soaked with sweat in 2 seconds, walk out to your car, step on a frog, and then stuck in traffic because some 95 year old drivers pacemaker tapped out.
You want more space? Than don’t move here, it’s not a city where you can have a 5 car garage unless you are Jerry Sienfeld and you can buy the parking garage across the street to house your car collection. You don’t need a garage because YOU DON"T NEED A CAR because public transportation is AWESOME. Hop on a mountain bike, which you can do in florida unless you want to be pedaling for like, 3 weeks before you get to where you need to go. If you fundamentally need to be in a car, cab it, rent one, or do one of those car-sharing deals with people in your building.
You don’t want to deal with so many people? Stay out of Times Square and stay off the subway at rush hour. Walk. Check out central park and have a falafel. Go to a museum. Don’t hang out in areas where fat families festooned with fanny packs are milling around taking cell-phone pictures.  Avoid the tourist areas and you’ll realize that this is big city with tons of room. You need more room that that, then move to the Brooklyn. I did. I am 10 minutes from the city, I have a house, car, yard, prospect park, tons of businesses, around, and I can still have Chinese food delivered at 3 in the morning.
  There are plenty of places in the NY without overcrowding, but thewhat you give up in space you get in having THE BEST OF EVERYTHING IN THE WORLD at your fingertips. Food, resources, shopping, culture, you name it, this it the mecca for good shit.
Crime? C’mon? Where did they shoot Cops? Florida! At least we don’t have block-long meth labs tucked away in every swamp. In a sense, our crime is more controllable, because it’s not so spread out. Something happens, 9 times out of 10, there is a patrol car 4 blocks away. People are scared to mess with the law here cuz you might get shot 61 times for no reason at all. That is a pretty strong incentive not to shoplift that Ipod.
But here is the main problem I have with Miami; it doesn’t matter that there are pretty girls, or sunshine, or good Cuban food, or houses with pools that are somewhat reasonably priced. Because you guys have tornados that will destroy everything you own out of nowhere. And it is hard to get any property insured there for just that reason. There’s always a million loopholes in the contracts because all the insurance companies know mother nature is gonna come kick your ass…SOON. AGAIN and AGAIN. We occasionally have a crazy terrorist, or serial killer, or whatever but they come and go. You guys have an ironclad lifetime warranty that there always will be another tornado just around the bend. Don’t even get me started on the mosquitos.

Posted on 04/04/2008 at 11:36 AM

Tu puta madre says:

While Brooklynindahowz has some valid points and observations, one must consider that he is in fact a New Yorker (or wannabe) and true to life, believes that New York is the best of all possible worlds, and that no other city in the world can compare.  Don’t get me wrong, I happen to love New York, just make sure you don’t use a public urinal because in about 30 seconds you’ll be surrounded by creepy guys trying to take a peek (i guess for some, that’s not a bad thing)  Sure you can get chinese food at 3 a.m. in the morning, along with a traffic jam on the brooklyn bridge or canal street at the same hour. I’m talking bumper to bumper, not moving…at friggin 3 a.m.??!!? Having driven in NYC dozens of times, I have to say that NY drivers are much meaner.  If you are in a lane that is suddenly closed off, there’s NO CHANCE that anyone will let you merge in.  They’d rather run into the person in front of them, rather than let you in.  The people in NY are drab, unfriendly, and just look worn out.  Next time you’re on the subway, just look at the faces.

And for the record, it’s hurricanes, not tornadoes, that have affected the insurability of homes.  But rest assured that has more to do with greedy insurers than with real risks.  Between 1970 and 1992, there were no major hurricanes to hit Miami. And um, didn’t a twister come roaring through new york recently. 
Yes the mosquitoes can be bothersome, but just put on your mom’s skin so soft and you’ll be fine.  If we’re gonna talk about pesky critters, then New Yorkers have no place to criticize.  Bringing your attention to the rat population that’s made it’s way out of the subways and into homes and restaurants.  ONLY IN NY (or a 3d world country) would you ever see anything like that…Hey, at least our frogs and gators are afraid of people…  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=su0U37w2tws
Indeed New York has a great public transportation system but isn’t so great if you are transporting large items, like a new computer.  Take a cab you say?  Well I’m black.  That’s easier said than done…

Sorry, but i think i’ll stick with my spanish tile roof house with a detached garage and a 10,000sf lot on a tree-lined street (where the trees have leaves for 12 months, not for 5)—which cost less than a 1 bedroom condo in HARLEM…and a lot cleaner and quieter too…

And crime—forget about the cops getting shot, what about the cops shooting unarmed citizens 41 times??? And getting away with it!!! only in NY.  And we won’t even talk about the race issue…Northeasterners are NOT the fairmminded people they like to make themselves out to be.  In Miami, there’s no place that I can think of where I would actually fear for my safety solely because of my race.  There are several neighborhoods in NY where I would not be welcomed
AS for the hot summers, they are long, but not as extreme.  Besides, that’s why god made air conditioners.  If you are sweating after you get out of the shower, it’s probably because you were doing something u shouldn’t have been doing in there in the first place…The peace of mind knowing that if i don’t get to the beach on Labor Day, I still have another 12 months of beach weather is enough to keep me here.

Posted on 04/04/2008 at 12:43 PM

brklnindahowz says:

Let me start with puta madre who likes to hang out in public urinals, but only if they are clean. They are urinals! Creepy stuff happens in them wherever they are. Didn’t the George Micheal bust happen in Florida? What do you want from a urinal? A doorman with list like one of those clubs on south beach? You’re pissing in there, not eating clams casino.
Traffic jam on brooklyn bridge at 3am…take manhattan bridge, williamsburg bridge, listen to 1010 wins to see what’s clear. There are always options. As for being mean drivers, NY’er’s are generally GOOD drivers who don’t tolerate BAD drivers, as people who try to merge in the middle of a lane rather than the end of it. So, while it may be rude, it serves the greater good to keep bad drivers from making erratic moves that could cause an accident. Yeah, some of our cab drivers think they are in a Camel Trophy event but that’s par the course. Overall New Yorkers are confident drivers which is the the most important part of driving once you have mastered the basic skills.
Mean,drab people? Pretty broad statement. Alert to people trying to hustle them, o.k., I’ll give you that but people risk their lives here for strangers in a blink of an eye. Just because we wear a lot of black doesn’t make us DR. Evil. we are just wary. But if a NYer sees someone in trouble, 9 times out of 10 they help out. It is just that living in an urban environment lends itself to growing bullshit detectors, because unfortunately, the scumbags are out there, like anywhere else.
Hurricane, tornado, alligator crocodile…who cares. End result is pretty similiar. It’s God saying “Nice house, now pull my finger” then farting in your face. Yeah, the insurers are greedy, but the end result is the same as well. The chances are you are not gonna recoup your loss if/when a hurricane takes everything you have, if you are lucky enough to live through it.
Next. To the Black guy who can’t catch cabs. I am not black and cabs won’t stop for me at night cuz I am 6 foot 4. I had to get a black guy to hail a cab for me a week ago. Again, be resourceful. Wait at a red light and when they stop, get in. They are bound by law to take you to destination once you are in or you can call a cop and they will get issued a hefty fine. I’ve done it, I know. It works.
transporting something to big for the subway. Here’s an idea; get it delivered for an extra 10 bucks. Eliminate the shlep factor. If its too big to take on the subway, chances are it’s expensive enough that the place you bought it from will deliver it no problem.
Race. Have all the race problems in Miami been solved? I wasn’t aware. So all the Haitians and Cubans are dancing along the beaches, arm in arm with the white trash rednecks in one big rainbow coalition. Glad you have it all worked out there. Race is an issue everywhere, at least here it is in your face and you will have allies.
As far as areas you don’t feel safe in because of your skin tone, do you really wanna go tour bensonhurst? What is there to see besides a lot of dudes with plucked eyebrows, and too much hair product? A little like south beach without the abs.
Seriously, though,you live in the south, where racism was born. I’m sure there is some exit off of a highway down there someplace where a bunch of hillbillys would not be to thrilled if you wanted to camp out next to their trailer homes.
You misunderstood my cop comment. I was alluding to the sean bell case in that the fact that the cops shot a guy repeatedly for really doing what seems to be nothing is ironically a crime deterrant. I am not condoning it, I am saying, if you are contemplating a crime, you might be less enthusiastic if you know you might get killed by some trigger happy nut in blue from hackensack.
Glad you enjoy your house, one of the perks of not living in a city. Downside, payscale will also be affected conversely. Where real estate is more affordable, jobs are less plentiful and pay less.
As far as trees with leaves all year. I love the fall. It’s beautiful. It it like the last hurrah before winter shows up and gives you snowball fights, and warming up by a fireplace. It’s a warning that something rough is coming so live it up. To bad there is nothing like that before a hurricane.
In summary; I like Miami a lot. I don’t think the world revolves around NYC, BUT I do believe that you can get the best of everything here and that is part of the appeal. The variety of people, culture, food, resources, etc is unbeatable. Frankly, warm weather all the time can be a bit boring. When you have cold to balance it against, you appreciate it more.
Oh, and the rats. You don’t bother them, they won’t bother you. You guys don’t have no rats in FLA?

Posted on 04/04/2008 at 3:20 PM

Matt says:

Very funny how some people can have different opinions, Miami is a 3rd world city with a nice front and palm trees but you drive 3 blocks away and you’re in the hood, I live in Miami for 2 years now, the worst “city”(If you can call that a city!) I ever lived in.
The greediest and most ignorant are there.
Racist Right wing Latinos is what is the most horrible, or I should say the worst Cubans in the world, criminal minded behavior is a must, driving with the finger.
You need to precise that the nasty ones are usually Cubans because there is also some nice Latinos, the corruption is massive.
Yes the weather is nice most of the year I won’t argue on that even if it gets nasty in the summer still be there than NYC.
People down here are interested in cars, clothing, drugs, plastic surgery and malls to show it off.
Saying hello to a stranger is being crazy.
Transportation system sucks, schools sucks, jobs don’t pay at all (we know it’s a southern state but c’mon).
I was gonna forget: Prostitution is everywhere.
Miami itself could be a great place to be the city is not the problem it’s the PEOPLE.
2/3 of people refuse to learn the official language of the country ENGLISH, I do speak fluent spanish but the sound of it now irritates me.
I know Latin America pretty good and can assure you that are usually very nice people, so why?
Castro emptied all his jails and mental hospitals to send them to Miami, so imagine the scum that is here.
Thanks Fidel you did a good job by sending you rotten in here!
Florida is flat and ignorant.
And the food:if you think that beans fried chicken and tostones is cuisine,
Cuban food or Mexican food I made my choice, bye bye tacky florida I going to Cali and will never come back to this shithole.

Posted on 05/01/2008 at 7:41 PM

tu puta madre says:

See ya later Matt.  We don’t need people like you in this city.  While some of the things you say are accurate, your message is lost since it becomes muddied by your clearly racist anti-cuban attitudes.  The fact that u say that there are also some nice latinos doesn’t change your otherwise very racist comments.  I suppose you’ve met all 600,000 cubans in Miami and you feel qualified to make those statements.  What about the black people who keep shooting each other up. What about the white people who keep molesting kids?  White about the gays who contribute to the fact that Miami Beach has one of the highest aids rates in the nation?  Let’s not forget the haitians and other latinos who bring their third world habits to the united states.  What is your ethnic background?  I’m sure i can think of some negative stereotype that has been applied to people in ur ethnic group.  There are assholes everywhere, in every ethnic category.  Don’t be one of them….oh wait..it’s too late…

Posted on 05/10/2008 at 4:41 PM

MierdaCubana says:

tu puta madre name fits you good but it should start with “mi”
you must be Cuban that would explain everything.
uneducated monkeys!
I know why there is a dictatorship in Cuba because they deserve it.
they are ruining the city with their fucked up attitude, empty Miami of cubans and it’ll be a “magic city”
Fidel is smart he got rid of the worst ones shit! now they’re here.
Ask a latino are you cuban and he’ll say “no gracias a dios!”
Everybody knows it Cubans are the problem in Miami and Boriquas are the problem in NYC.
Islanders should stay in their islands drinking their rom and beating their wifes.
FUCK MIAMI!!!!!!!

Posted on 05/10/2008 at 9:04 PM

Matt Meltzer says:

I was really confused by that coment 2 comments ago until I realized you were talking to the comenter Matt and not the writer Matt. Though never one to shy away from politcally incorrect statements, I was trying to find them in this article and was abgout to accuse you of being a little to sensative.

Posted on 05/10/2008 at 10:33 PM

tuputamadre says:

MierdaCubana,
Rum is spelled with a “u” not an “o”.  And I’m not cuban, I’m african american.  There, that should give you some fodder to call me all sorts of names. Let’s see how creative u can be…and leave out the n-word—it’s been overused.  U can do better than that.

Posted on 05/11/2008 at 12:10 PM

mierdacubana says:

One track mind mister, rom is spelled with a O in latin america, oh but yes I forget you only speak english, I actually don’t care what you are I just wanna say that Miami brings the worst in people and it happens that I don’t like Cubans from Miami i can’t help it, we all have our thoughts I’m just not afraid to say what a lot of people think, and cut the bullshit everyone is a racist at some point , it’s only human.
the truth is that I live in the middle of a cuban neighborhood and I just hate
their behavior, I have the right to say what I feel without feeling guilty of being politically correct, fuck that, if people were as honest as I am it would be better I think.
I lived in many cities around the world
and know for a fact that besides the weather and the Beach Miami is shithole without any culture.
So people need to know before they are coming and realize they screwed up by coming down here.
Miami is like Queens NY by the beach, not exactly paradise, you wanna know somewhere beautiful go to Hawaii that ‘s a real paradise not artificial everything, but Miami please, travel a little bit and you will understand what I talking about.
Don’t hate me I just expressed what I feel.
So like Eminem says if don’t like it u can suck my ....

Posted on 05/11/2008 at 12:35 PM

tuputamadre says:

Wow, you really are chock full of generalizations and stereotyping.  First, what makes u think I only speak English?  Did you assume that because I’m african american i don’t have the intellect to learn another language?  As a matter of fact, I speak spanish.  I have friends that i chat with exclusively in spanish.  And if you spoke spanish, you’d know that rum is spelled “ron”.....not rom….It’s note even worth addressing all of your points.  You quite obviously know it all….No one hates you because you express what you feel.  They simply reject you because your opinions aren’t well thought out, and your writing reflects a lack of education….But you’re too ignorant to realize it….You should go to Herald.com where you will be in like company as that site is chock full of anti-cuban, anti-immigrant, anti-black commentators….Rest assured that the bad things about miami begin with people like you.  If you don’t like it, then leave.

Posted on 05/11/2008 at 4:00 PM

yomama says:

a message for tuputamadre: me cago en la tumba de tu madre hijo de puta.

Posted on 05/15/2008 at 2:10 PM

tu puta madre says:

yomama, i’m so impressed by your prose.  Did you think of that on your own.  I’m sure your parents are extremely proud of you.

Posted on 05/15/2008 at 2:29 PM

... says:

English is not the legal language of the country, FYI people, it’s the de facto language- meaning most popular.  Only makes SENSE that in an area populated primarily by Hispanics that the Spanish language will be more popular.  Yo mama and mierdacubana- I don’t know ANYONE who is not proud of their Cuban ancestry so quit talkin’ out yer asses, you’re looking a tad foolish. 
Along the lines of ‘talkin ‘out yer asses,’ get some history books and start reading.  The first wave of Cuban immigrants came in the late 50s and continued into the 60s.  The Mariel Boatlift of the 80s is when Castro ‘emptied the jails’ as you say.  What Castro did was give ANYONE the opportunity to come to America- not just criminals as you imply.  They just jumped onboard, literally, with the tens of thousands of families with CHILDREN that came.  I’m happy to send you articles, facts and pictures showing that CHILDREN where the largest number received during the Mariel Boatlift.  Criminals did come and where interviewed/processed upon arrival.  Those that were known criminals, bore tattoos or markings associated with criminal gangs or jails or had diseases, were sent back or sent to jail.  In extreme cases, almost 30 years later, some are still sitting in jails.  Yup- sent back, a practice we still follow today.  It’s called deportation. Did some get through? Of course, ‘cuz the ‘white man’ let ‘em through- haha. 
You know what the Cubans (or any other non-anglo group) DIDN’T do though?  Rape, steal, murder and pilfer when they came here (like the forefathers of this great country did to the Indians).  Are people rude in Miami- maybe, but I prefer to say they are self-absorbed.  I don;t WANT to talk to your racist ass if you think my entire existence is a waste of your precious space- space EVERYONE in family has busted their ass to make more productive not to mention pretty.  Actually, my Cuban grandmothers taught me that being a racist was far worse than being a criminal. 
I laugh at generalizations about how shitty Hispanics- Cubans and Puerto Ricans specifically, have ruined cities in this country and cause crime up the wazoo.  Stats prove it nationwide,  Hispanics are the among the LEAST populous group in jails following African Americans who FOLLOW anglos.
For a city that is SOOOOO crappy, we sure have TENS OF THOUSAND OF PEOPLE worldwide that come in droves to live, work and play.  Not many cities can boast that. 
As for rats, I’m sure we have them but the only place I’ve ever seen rats roaming freely is at the Monkey Jungle (Miami) and on NYC streets.  Throw all the names you want, but I have one generalization you can’t combat- Miami is way CLEANER than NYC; smells nicer too.  Maybe it’s because Hispanics are cleanER folks…or maybe I’m just making general statements BASED ON MY PERSONAL OPINION, but I’ll take heated driving to a stinky city ANY DAY.

Posted on 05/17/2008 at 7:28 AM

Desie says:

i love miami, love miami, love miami, OOOHH-la-la!!

Posted on 05/17/2008 at 6:30 PM

Matt says:

This all doesn’t relate to Miami, stop the fighting. To clear something up, it’s blacks, then hispanics, then whites, in terms of incarceration rate.

“At midyear 2007 there were 4,618 black male sentenced prisoners per 100,000 black males in the United States, compared to 1,747 Hispanic male sentenced prisoners per 100,000 Hispanic males and 773 white male sentenced prisoners per 100,000 white males.”

“Blacks were almost three times more likely than Hispanics and five times more likely than whites to be in jail.”

Those statistics are right from the Bureau of Justice Statistics :

http://www.ojp.usdoj.gov/bjs/prisons.htm
http://www.ojp.usdoj.gov/bjs/jails.htm

“Actually, my Cuban grandmothers taught me that being a racist was far worse than being a criminal.  “

One thing your grandmother should have taught you- being a racist is just as bad as being a criminal, and being a criminal is not any more respectable, “okay”, or morally-right than be a racist, you are having the same disregard for someone else as a racist has (Most crime is violent, and most drug crime leads to violence, all in all around 70%).

Not saying that this proves anything, just trying to keep everyone well informed.

Also, I have been to Miami, the traffic isn’t THAT bad. I think people are just used to be catered on and so they complain about the slightest thing. I frequently get stuck in traffic for 2 hours and only end up moving 20 miles, and I am ninja-ing on back roads.

Every city has it’s good and bad. It’s ridiculous for people to rag on a city they have never lived in. Personally, while Miami has it’s blunt and “self-absorbed” individuals, so does every city. I bet that 99% of the people here in Bethesda,MD are much more self-absorbed than most of the people in Miami. It all just depends on the location and the neighborhood. Houses here generally are around >2 million in Bethesda. Renting in a shit neighborhood like Beltsville, College Park will run upwards of 1100/month, and your car will get stolen and the DEA, ATF,  Secret Service, and FBI will raid the apartment across from you(As I was moving out I found out that the guy was the ATF’s number 1 on the ATF’s most wanted). Just like there are spots of DC I will get shot for driving through(Anacostia), there are probably parts of Miami AND NYC where the same thing will occur. People need to not focus on the bad stuff that is associated with URBAN areas and focus more on the good and bad that you do not ordinarily see in a city. That is what will be helpful to people wondering whether it would be a good place for them.

Posted on 06/08/2008 at 1:45 AM

Matt H. says:

that was a diff Matt just to clear things up ^, should’ve put my last name on there so it wouldn’t look like the other Matt

Posted on 06/08/2008 at 1:47 AM

tu puta madre says:

Crime statistics, as with any statistic, can be manipulated and misleading.  The incarceration rates might lead someone to conclude that blacks are 3 times more likely than hispanics to commit crimes and 5 times more likely than whites.  What these statistics don’t take into account is that within the criminal justice system there are racial disparity that reflect institutionalized racism.  For example, blacks are more likely to be accused of crimes than other groups.  And juries are more likely to convict blacks and give them stiffer sentences.  Further, in the 1980s the rate of incarceration skyrocketed for blacks with the introduction of crack cocaine, a cheaper alternative to white powder cocaine.  The penalties for crack possession are far stiffer than the penalties for powder cocaine.  So you have a white guy using coke, a black guy using crack, the black guy gets the stiffer sentence, while the white guy gets probation.  The stiffer penalties for crack cocaine are unquestionably related to the rise in the black prison population.  These disparities aren’t just racial, they are socieconomic.  A guy who swindles millions of elderly pension holders out of billions of dollars, and leaving them penniless, gets a 5 year prison sentence. Someone smoking crack, after his 3d conviction, gets mandatory life in prison. 
There are also gender based inequities.  We’ve seen quite a bit of publicity regarding white female teachers having sex with their underage students (this is almost unheard of with respect to black female teachers). These white chicks get a slap on the wrist.  Meanwhile, a man, doing the exact same thing would get a lengthy prison term.  A black man would get an even stiffer sentence, and if the student is a white chick, he can expect to spend 30 years in jail.  Just look at the 18 year old black high school kid in georgiea who got 35 years for having consensual sex with two white 15 year olds girls…That would never have happened to a white kid….  So be careful of the statistics and what they really show.

Posted on 06/08/2008 at 11:41 AM

Uhhh what? says:

So you’re telling me that since crack is the “drug of choice” for black people, and coke is more for white people, that this is totally a conspiracy to incarcerate black people? Haha. Man, I will agree with you that the officers that go about arresting people are racist on average, BUT, the legislation regarding these drugs has NOTHING to do with race. If you think so, I’m sorry, you’re just dumb. Someone who is addicted to crack is much more likely to rob a store, mug someone, etc than someone addicted to coke.

And of course rich people will get away with things, white collar crime basically has no punishment if you are rich, which is sad.

While I completely agree with you cannot make a point solely on a statistic, you definitely cannot going pulling made up numbers out of your ass. That just makes you look like a fool.

Posted on 06/08/2008 at 12:55 PM

tu puta madre says:

Please show me where in my post did i say that this was a conspiracy.  You pulled that one right “out of your ass”.  I never even suggested that there was any such intent.  While in law school, we studied the racial disparities in the criminal justice system.  You can have a facially neutral policy that has a disparate impact on certain groups, much like the weight requirements that police and fire departments had for applicants.  The policies were neutral on their faces, and applied to all.  However, a disproportionate number of women were excluded because they did not meet the weight requirements.  These policies were challenged in the supreme court and were found to be discriminatory, even if they weren’t intended to be.  The same can be said about the stricter penalties for crack possession.  My point is not that society is unfair to black people, and whites have a conspiracy against blacks or anythign of the sort.  I was simply admonishing the readers not to put that much faith in statistics because the story behind the statistics might tell a different story. 

visit http://www.drugwarfacts.org/racepris.htm

That website quotes the following.

In 1986, before mandatory minimums for crack offenses became effective, the average federal drug offense sentence for blacks was 11% higher than for whites. Four years later following the implementation of harsher drug sentencing laws, the average federal drug offense sentence was 49% higher for blacks.

According to the federal Household Survey, “most current illicit drug users are white. There were an estimated 9.9 million whites (72 percent of all users), 2.0 million blacks (15 percent), and 1.4 million Hispanics (10 percent) who were current illicit drug users in 1998.” And yet, blacks constitute 36.8% of those arrested for drug violations, over 42% of those in federal prisons for drug violations. African-Americans comprise almost 58% of those in state prisons for drug felonies; Hispanics account for 20.7%.

These statistic support my position that just because there are more blacks in prison, doesn’t mean that more blacks are committing crimes.  It means that they are more likely to be accused, tried and convicted, and juries will give them stiffer penalties than their white counterparts…  This is factual and not really up for debate.  I never said that this was a conspiracy.  It is what it is.  You inability to read my post and understand the very simple concepts therein, and the fact that you somehow suggested that i conform to a conspiracy theory actually makes you look like an ill-informed, illiterate fool.

Posted on 06/10/2008 at 9:51 AM

Kesely Hotaling says:

I’m new to this site and there are some good points and pointless arguments as most blogs seem to produce which retract from the original intention of such a blog:  how does Miami compare with other major U.S. cities.  personally, I loved Miami and I still consider it a “hot” destination.  I have lived in LA, San Diego and NYC (Soho) for the last 9 years now.  I love NY too, but have recently really started missing the beach, warm, clear blue water, green and palm trees.  I guess that’s why a lot of New York City residents have become bicoastal.  My neighborhood downtown (called Soho) is turning into Ocean Drive without the women in bikinis, but still beautiful place to be.  i just want to live here in the summers and be in Miami for the winters and plan on living in Europe as well for 4 months of the year. 

So let me ask you guys.  I have a pretty high income bracket and my own “international counsulting” business and want to buy a house in South Beach on one of the islands.  You gentlemen have any suggestions?  Also, I’m curious about how it is to make friends.  I am very social and of mixed race so no one can put a finger on where I’m from - I have no color or stereotyped notions so I feel somewhat lucky.  I remember the last 2 times I visited South Beach, more so than before, people seemed to be rude - maybe because everyone is showing off or think they are the cream of the crop?  I don’t know… for a single guy like me, I have fun in New York and don’t really chase women because they’ve been approached by too much game from all types.  I’m just blunt if I like you I ask you out.  So how is the scene for finding “legitimate” girlfriend types.  And as for finding friends and not being from their, how’s that situation.  Pretty general questions, but asking more about the quality of people and places to go or events, social gatherings where you can meet decent types.  Any hints would be great. 

You guys should stop arguing, you know everyone has valid points and everyone is their own person and their personal experiences shape their mentality - you can’t change people, just try to open their eyes a little, but that’s their choice to make.  Miami is aesthetically beautiful I think.  I feel “alive” inside when I’m there, just like I do in NYC in the summer - so much energy and visual stimulation and the weather, palm trees, half-naked good-looking people . . come on!  That’s the human beauty. 

So, please, anyone have good advice or pointers for a about to be transplant - let me know.  I would appreciate it.

Posted on 06/21/2008 at 4:07 PM

tu puta madre says:

My recommendation is to get a real estate agent.  It’s difficult for anyone to give you any real insight on social networking because we don’t know what type of person you are.  You’d be better suited talking to a friend who actually knows you and knows what you are looking for.  If you are flashy and into the drug scene, you’ll have plenty of company on South Beach.  I’ve been to SoHo and I agree that it has become a Northeastern version of SoBe.  People who think they are fabulous and appear to be somewhat superficial. (Although I’ve seen more butt and lip implants on SoBe-men and women-than I care to count).

Living in a city and playing in a city are two different things.  If you plan to make Miami your home, you may be, or become, somewhat interested in politics.  No one, not even the pacifists, has anything good to say about Miami politics.  As for people being rude, I think that comes from the fact that there are so many competing groups, and there doesn’t appear to be any real intermingling.  Some folks will attribute the rudeness to the fact that we have a huge population of immigrants who come from countries where there are limited resources, and there is a prevalent “i gotta get mine” attitude.  This has been echoed by colleagues who were actually born and raised in the third world.  I’ve had the opportunity to visit some of these countries, and others, and frankly, I think French people as a group, are ruder than any other group in the western hemisphere. 

Whatever the reason for the rudeness, you’re observations are accurate and will only be solidified once you move here. However, just go to Broward and it’s a world of difference.  Head to Palm Beach and you’ll actually observe that cars stop for pedestrians—something you won’t see on South Beach. 

As for the women, I’m really amazed at how important money appears to be to them, especially the clubgoing crowd.  But I left that scene many years ago and would be remiss to try and offer any insight. 

Friends can be found anywhere, depending on what your interests are. If you don’t know anyone down here, then it probably will be very difficult to meet new friends.  As for South BEach, I actually used to live there, and I’ve never seen a place so decadent and proliferated with recreational drug use.  My best estimate is that greater than half the population who live and play on south beach indulge in drug use.  There are, however, many good people here in Miami, but you’re probably better off meeting them at some of the finer restaurants as well as at the events hosted by the burgeoning art community.  Many of the NY and LA artists have recognized that Miami has a growing art community, and my experience is that the events tend to draw crowds that are much higher caliber than what you would see on south beach.  I hope this information helps you.

And take a berlitz course in spanish if you don’t speak it.  You’ll need it.  Many of the establishments hire people who speak little or no english.

Posted on 06/23/2008 at 9:41 AM

Desie says:

Finally we’re back on course, no more trading of insults! Having been here for 9 months now, I can concur with a lot of what tu puta madre says at #32.  What I’d like to add is that Miami has a certain flavor, but I’m still trying hard to define it.  Who knows? Maybe it’s the proliferation of Third Worlders, including myself, but so far as I can see there are many of we call ‘profilers’ back where I’m from, coupled with the striving for a more ‘cosmopolitann’ identity . . . I don’t know. Anyway, for the moment I’m just chillin’and workin’ my a** off and taking a bored life easy

Posted on 06/23/2008 at 9:56 PM

Desie says:

Maybe it’s the proliferation of Third Worlders, including myself, but so far as I can see there are many of we call ‘profilers’ back where I’m from, coupled with the striving for a more ‘cosmopolitann’ identity . . . I don’t know.——Sorry for the typos folks I meant to say” There are many of those here who back where I’m from we call ‘profilers’ , i.e. social climbers, coupled with the feeling that this town is struggling to shake itself free of some sort of inferiority status, longing to join the big leagues of more cosmopolitan cities like NY, and London.” Don’t get me wrong, this is a beautiful city, and I like living here ... but there’s just something about the soul of Miami that’s just not coming through.

Posted on 06/23/2008 at 10:06 PM

Heather says:

Three of the cities here are rated higher in the most liveable cities in the world than Miami, and each one of them has lower crime, and each one of them are growing cities, and each one of them are better for jobs, and each one of them have a stronger housing market despite the current economic conditions.  Those cities are; Atlanta, Seattle, San Francisco and New York.  I would live in any one of those cities ahead of risking my life in closed-off Miami.  Because of it’s geographical location, it’s also unrealistic to get away when you want to.  I would rather chew off my right arm than live in Miami, and it is as bad as Phoenix.  Yuck!

Posted on 07/23/2008 at 5:18 PM

tu puta madre says:

Well Heather, i guess it depends on what you are looking for.  In the past three years, I’ve travelled to the dominican republic twice, nicaragua twice, puerto rico, and guatemala.  If you like to travel to latin america, miami is the perfect place to be since Spirit airlines has dirt cheap tickets and is based outta fort lauderdale.  Also American and USAir have very reasonable prices between miami, new york, DC and atlanta.  So I actually think its a good location for those of us who like to travel…unless your idea of a getaway is a road trip to some domestic city….Yeah, miami has crime, so did new york before giuliani.  To each his own.

Posted on 07/23/2008 at 8:53 PM

Melly says:

God I hate Miami. It’s the only city in the world where the people try to make you feel inferior for speaking 4 languages, even though they only speak one. Just because it’s not theirs. Uhg! Peasants.

Still, I enjoyed the article and it makes me feel a little better for living in Miami. Although, I disagree with L.A.  When I used to live there, it was an absolute joy. I don’t know, maybe I’m weird but I thought everybody there was soooo nice.

Posted on 09/05/2008 at 10:17 PM

tu putamadre says:

Melly, I’m not sure where you were meeting people but in my circle of friends who speak english, spanish, and creole, we welcome people who have more to offer.  If you are in places that are frequented by unsophisticates, then I’m not surprised by your experiences.  But i would hope that you wouldn’t let 5 or 6 experience cloud your judgement about a group of 2 million people.

Posted on 09/06/2008 at 5:25 PM

Matt Meltzer says:

I don’t think anyone looks down on anybody who speaks four languages. I just think that if English isn’t one of those four, they do. And have every right to since it is the language of the nation.

Posted on 09/07/2008 at 11:51 AM

tu puta madre says:

Hmm, I didn’t know that anyone had the “right” to look down on anyone.  I’ve always contended that if the political climate changed here in the US such that we had to flee to another non-english speaking country, and that we set up American “enclaves” with american owned businesses and schools, then most Americans wouldn’t bother learning the language of their new land.  Sure enough in my travels to Nicaragua and Panama, I discovered that there were enclaves of american expats who, after retiring, moved to these countries to take advantage of the extremely inexpensive way of life.  These same americans have refused to learn spanish and expect the locals to communicate with them in English, and become rather indignant when they encounter local merchants who don’t speak english.  Hmmm, sound familiar?  If you only speak one language and haven’t bothered learning any other language, then you have no place to criticize those miamians who have not bothered learning english.  That crap about “this is america speak english” is just that. More accurately “this is america, take advantage of the free education and learn as much as you can, including other languages.”

Posted on 09/07/2008 at 1:28 PM

Matt Meltzer says:

The beautiful thing about America is that everyone does, in fact, have the right to look down on whomever they so choose. Justified or not.

And insofar as Americans who move and don’t lern the local language, I agree. If you move to a country, learn to speak their language. I speak Spanish, by the way, but refuse to do it in America unless it is to get myself on Sabado Gigante. Otherwise, if you’re in America, speak English.End of story.

When I went To Cuba, I spoke Spanish to everyone. Same with Dominican Republic and Mexico. Now, I expect the same courtesey from them.

Posted on 09/07/2008 at 8:19 PM

tu puta madre says:

I guess you’re right.  This is america.  Whites have the right to look down on blacks, and straight people have the right to look down on gays, and Christians have the right to look down on Jews. Thanks for clarifying that.  I forgot what a great country of freedoms we live in.  That really does make america beautiful and its leaves me with a warm fuzzy feeling in my heart to know that you agree that the right to look down on others is one of the “beautiful things about america”.

Posted on 09/08/2008 at 9:45 AM

SF to Miami says:

I am currently in midst of deciding whether to accept a job that requires relocating to Miami.  I currently reside in San Francisco and totally love the city.  I live in the latin part of town and totally enjoy the flavors and culture and therefore baffled with all the hate comments.  Anyway, what I would like to know is:

1.  Is South Beach the best place to live if you don’t know anyone (not into the drug scene)?

2.  How bad is the traffic?  Currently I commute 1hr 20mins each way to work.

3.  What do you guys consider rude?  I keep getting conflicting information from different blogs.  Some people consider it rude if they say “hi” and you dont respond.  I dont particularly say “hi” to random strangers but if someone needs help as in directions etc am willing to oblige.

4.  I found some apartment rentals at the Flamingo South Beach, any thoughts.

I am excited about this new opportunity and would I appreciate your feedback.

Posted on 10/07/2008 at 9:48 PM

tu puta madre says:

1.  South Beach is probaby the worst place to live if you don’t know anyone.  I lived there for 6 months.  People are not pleasant at all.  If you are gay, or you are into the club scene, you’ll be in heaven, but here in Miami, many of the South Beachers, who moved there because they thought it was trendy, have moved to other calmer, friendly neighborhoods like Miami Shores, Belle Meade and El Portal. 

2.  Traffic getting on and off South bEach is remarkably tame compared to I-95 traffic or even worst 836 or 826.  Look at a map of Miami to see which roads i’m referring to.  South beach traffic is bad on the weekends, and particularly bad during holidays.  I’m talking so bad, sometimes they only let residents in.  If you decide to live on SoBe, stay away from Ocean Drive, Collins and 5th street.  They are major thoroughfares. 

3.  Rude is if you are waiting in the deli line, and the clerk says “next” and a person who is tenth in line blurts out her order as if the other people ahead of her don’t matter.  Rude is holding the door open for someone, and the thought to say thank you doesn’t enter their minds.  Even if you don’t normally say hello, imagine how you would feel if you did, and the person simply ignored.  You’ll hear different comments about life here. Some love it, some hate it.  But i think it’s pretty much agreed by the masses that even those who love miami think that its full of rude people.  Rude is having someone speak to you in spanish, and when you tell them you don’t speak spanish, they give you a nasty look, like you’re beneath them (yeah, go figure) and then mumble obscenities under their breath.  Of course all these things can and do happen anywhere, but after livinig her for a year, I guarantee you will think that the people here are rude.  I’d be willing to pay your rent for a year if you coome to a different conclusion.

4.  If i had to live on South Beach, I’d live in the exact area you’ve chosen. Bay Road has less traffic than Alton or any other road, it’s walking distance from Lincoln Road and my favorite gourmet shop Epicure, and you are right on the bay.  Not a bad choice, although rents in SoBe remain the highest in the city.  You can find a steal in Ft. Lauderdale and Downtown Miami.  Not quite as dynamic as SoBe, but super luxurious high rise apartments at probably 30% less than what you’d pay on SoBe.  The commute from Ft. Laud. is a bitch, however

Posted on 10/08/2008 at 5:11 PM

Matt Meltzer says:

Even though I am the resdient, bitter poster on this site, I feel I need to contradict that…

1. If you don’t know anyone, how are you supposed to in a place like El Portal or Miami Shores? The Beach has built-in interaction since everyone is so close together, and if you stay away from the snooty people it’s a preety chill place. Just make sure you stay in with the right crowd.

2. Traffic in Miami is BAD, but not in SF’s league. I’ve lived in both cities, and while both have their perpetual traffic snarls, SF’s can go on all day, and for 30 or 40 miles. Miami’s are for the most part avoidable and rarely last more than 10 miles. If you are used to an 80 minute commute, you’ll be ok.

3. People here are more inconsiderate than they are rude. It’s really the same as if you go to a Latin American country. the culture is remarkable similar. Efficiency, which is a hallmark of California living, is unheardof here, but people don’t go out of their way to be rude. They just may not hold a door for you, or let you go ahead in the grocery line when you have only one item.

4. The Flamingo’s building motto is “South Beach Revolves Around Us.” ‘Nuff said. A lot of just-out-of-college trust fund babies, douchbegas, and arrogant South Americans. but if that’s your scene, you’ll probably like it. the amenities are nice and so are the apartments.

Posted on 10/08/2008 at 8:04 PM

tu puta madre says:

1.  I think matt may have misunderstood my response.  I wasn’t suggesting that you move to one of these neighborhoods.  First, there are very few rentals, and the prices are little high given the size of the homes.  My point is that South Beach may not necessarily have the appeal that it did 10 years ago when everyone wanted to live there.  There was a cognizable exodus which suggests that its not all that its cracked up to be.  I wasn’t suggesting the other neighborhoods, althoug to be sure, the neighborhoods described above tend to have people who are friendlier, less pretentious and easier to meet.  That’s how you can meet other people.  I know all of my neighbors.  In SoBe, i didn’t know the name of a single person in my condo.  But if you’re looking at the Flamingo, el portal, miami shores and belle meade clearly wouldn’t suit your needs.

2.  You can probably google “traffic” and find out how the cities compare.  Concededly, traffic in Miami has gotten lighter.  I’ve been taking 95 for the past 7 years and it’s definitely lighter than it was when gas was $1.45 a gallon.  I have 2 coworkers.  one lives in Kendall the other in Boca.  From Downtown, the one in Kendall arrives home later than the one going to Boca, which is about 30 miles further.  Stay away from Kendall and Hialeah, and you’ll be fine.

3.  Rude? inconsiderate? i mean, are we splitting hairs here.  SF, i think you get the picture.  Miami reportedly has the rudest drivers in the country.  Or maybe the most inconsiderate drivers.  Who knows, who cares.  Neither is a virtue.

4.  I don’t know much about Flamingo.  It looks pretty, though. Matt described most of south beach luxury highrise condo residents.

Honestly.  I’ll be very very frank.  I’m not sure what ur ethnic background is, but I don’t think I’ve ever come across a white american who lives here who loves miami.  Most of the ones i know hate it.  If the rudeness doesn’t get to you, or the traffic, surely the cuban american politics will make u sick to ur stomach…..but maybe u don’t are about politics.

On a positive note.  The beaches are beautiful, and the weather from November through April makes all the maladies worthwhile.  Where else can you go to the beach on christmas day, or wear a wife beater on new years??

Posted on 10/08/2008 at 8:51 PM

Matt Meltzer says:

Exactly. For a White American it’s tough, but the good tends to outweigh the bad.

Posted on 10/10/2008 at 5:25 PM

Matias says:

I lived 2 years in Miami, South beach, Hallandale Beach and Coral gables.
I kept moving to different neighborhoods hoping it would improve my miserable experience with people.
I lived in NYC, SF, Honolulu, Amsterdam, Paris and Santa Fe and I can tell you by far it was the worst city I ever lived.
It is truly the city of criminals, and of course not everyone is a criminal but it is part of Miami culture, it is a cool thing to be an asshole regardless the race.
Half the city expansion was made by drug trafficking and killings.
Anyone who care to move to Miami need to beware it is not what it seems to be.
Remember that you’re in a southern state.
It’s too bad because the weather and the beach make a nice combination.
The economy is a joke down there, people are very greedy and self absorbed and especially racist in general.
Even though when you start to know people they are kind of nasty but later on they open up and you realize that they can be nice eventually.
It is truly a city to show off.
While most latin American countries are struggling to survive, here they like wasting money on stupid things like Hummers and big trucks, shopping non stop.
Miami is great o come for a week-end or short vacationing but not live, everyone hates it.
One big advice: Do not move to miami unless you know what to expect.
Your mental health depends on it.

Posted on 10/23/2008 at 4:35 PM

Koby says:

I lived in Miami for 18 years and i loved every second of it. I’m white and i don’t speak spanish and i had no problem meeting people or talking to the majority of the population I agree that you must go down there with the right mindset. I agree with the comments made about how rude people are down there but once you get to know some people, they are some of the friendliest and nicest people. Also all the comments made about people not speaking English is not entirely true. Most of the people that don’t speak English are the uneducated ones or the people that came straight from South America. Plenty of people speak English. Also, everyone complains about the crime but certain parts of Miami are not bad and the drug trade is not what it use to be back in the 80’s and 90’s. All i can say is i love Miami and if you plan on moving there, go down there with an open mind and be ready for a huge culture shock.

Posted on 02/05/2009 at 8:02 PM

DesieTee says:

Koby, you’re right about the culture shock LOL!!

Posted on 02/08/2009 at 12:11 AM

BustinNutts says:

Matt, you’re right about the Flamingo, I live there now. hit the nail on the head. But FYI, these apartments aren’t that nice. At $1,500 +$160/mo for parking these apartments SUCK. I can here my neighbor taking a piss. I just moved out from living with my gf of 2 years who cheated on me so I figured this would be a good place to live to meet people…so far, eh, not really, but then again I work all the time so maybe it’s my fault but I am pretty sure everyone here is to insecure to go up to someone and say hi (except this ugly hoe at the pool the other day).

Posted on 03/27/2009 at 7:10 AM

manny says:

I was going to write my opinion on Miami and how it compares to other cities but for what? your all idiots, just go to sleep and don’t wake up.

Posted on 04/06/2009 at 10:48 PM

tu puta madre says:

Manny, I am going to go the mile and guess that you are a miamian, probably a latino, if so, 60% chance u are cuban, and you are offended by the criticisms of miami and its people. hmmm, basically telling dissenters to die doesn’t make you sound warm and friendly.

Posted on 04/06/2009 at 11:20 PM

BustinNutts says:

Is it true that Fidel put all Cuba’s criminals on a boat and shipped them here? That right there should have gotten him assassinated..that’s ridiculous. But maybe that was just bs, someone enlighten me.

Posted on 04/06/2009 at 11:24 PM

tu puta madre says:

In 1980, the US accepted, and Castro allowed, almost all cubans who wanted to leave the island to go freely, with some exceptions.  It was later learned that Castro had released prisoners and patients at mental health facilities, and allowed them to leave the country.  It turned out to be a big black eye for Jimmy Carter.  No one expected over 100,000 cubans to show up in a 6 month period.  You can imagine what that did to Miami-Dade county.  Exiles will argue that the prisoners were mostly non-violent political prisoners.  Others beg to differ.  Of course, you really shouldn’t rely on others to provide you with information.  You can google this topic and find many articles from reputable outlets.  Don’t be intellectually lazy.

Posted on 04/07/2009 at 8:47 AM

marty says:

there’s probably a reason why they are able to pull of bangbus in miami

gangbang the bitches on the bus
ahahahah BECAUSE ITS MIAMI!
you can get away with anything!

Posted on 09/20/2009 at 5:16 PM

Name says:

I have been to San Fran, Chicago, Philly, Vegas, Reno, Dallas, Denver on and on. I just came back from Miami a few days ago and I’m already planning my move there.I loved everything about Miami. And it is probably the most gorgeous city I have ever seen. I even love the beaches. (And I spent 7 years living in Panama City Beach. If you been there, you know how nice they are) Miami has it all.

Posted on 03/10/2010 at 6:45 PM

Matt Meltzer says:

Good luck. I just got back from PCB, actually. Great beaches up there but not much else to do. Except this time of year, of course. But be strongly advised, living here is about 100,000 times different than visiting.

Posted on 03/11/2010 at 11:01 PM

nando ny says:

tu puta madre. si es verdad que hablas español entonces me entiendes, callate la boca y deja que cada quien opine lo que quiera vivo en new york y lo odio quiero irme para miami.

Posted on 04/28/2010 at 1:55 PM

Tu puta madre says:

Nando, how can u tell me that everyone can have an opinion and then tell me to shut up when i express my own opinion.  Tu eres cubano? Pues si tu eres, eso explica todo…,And for the benefit of our readers write in english. Ur not in the third world anymore.

Posted on 04/28/2010 at 8:37 PM

ezra says:

i have lived in san francisco, san diego, LA, boulder, NYC, houston, DC, and about 14 other places. you are right on with your assessment of the cities you included. DC could not suck more than any city i’ve lived in (i’ve not lived in detroit, but for the obvious reasons i spend as little time possible in that hell hole…and don’t even get me started on why DEMF is better than WMC.) i’m moving to miami soon, can’t wait, will see you there in miami bitch.

Posted on 06/21/2010 at 10:19 PM

Girly says:

This is hilarious!!! I have traveled to all of these cities you’ve written about and agree 100%! I was living in San Francisco for a few years and liked some things about it, but for the same rent I was paying for a tiny shithole with no a/c, I can get a luxury apartment in Miami Beach so I’m SOOOO there.

It’s a good thing i’m an asshole; I’ll fit right in.

Posted on 08/29/2010 at 2:23 PM

Tony Knows says:

I have lived in Houston and Miami. Houston is similar to Miami when it comes to the weather. The difference is Miami is about 12 degrees warmer at night than Houston in the winter. Houston has the best restaurants in the country next to NY. There is no comparing the night life of Miami to Houston. Then no city can compete against Miami in the nightlife category. Houston is a great city to raise a family. Miami is a great city to go to have the time of your life. The economy in Texas is one of the best. Austin is less than two hours away. I live and make my business in Houston and Dallas and about every other month I fly to Miami to reward my self for hard work. Now thats how you do Miami baby! Live somewhere really really nice make your money and party somewhere really really nice. Houston and Miami for life baby.

Posted on 10/23/2010 at 7:33 AM

My 2 Cents says:

NYC is old, historical, smart, and fabulous.  Miami is new, warm, pretty, and the fun has a shelf life, but thats it, it has no substance.  Its like, NYC is Gary Oldman and Miami is Kim Kardashian.  One has nothing to do with the other.  It all depends on what you are seeking.

Posted on 04/04/2011 at 8:57 PM

Cara says:

I grew up in NYC and am back there after living in LA for 2 years….  I got used to nicer housing, decent rents (as compared to Manhattan, where I now live), great weather, and a much nicer way of life than NY.  Although LA can be a bit one industry dominated, I actually enjoyed it.  I am now considering Miami or surrounding environs.  I am divorced, female, work in health care, date multi-culturally, like to work out, drink wine,dine and just hang…. Any suggestions?

Posted on 08/03/2011 at 2:41 PM

Matt Meltzer says:

Suggestions insofar as what?

Posted on 08/04/2011 at 12:08 AM

Florida Native says:

Just to clarify - most people who live on South Beach…or on any of the beaches really - are not Florida natives.  Miami Beach is a weird part of town.  In fact, actual Miami natives are hard to come by.  I’m a Miami native and most people I come across are not originally from Miami. Those are the people who are normally not very friendly.  I think the language barriers have a lot to do with that - and I’m not just talking Spanish because Miami is an international hub.  There’s probably a lack of understanding from culture to culture where good intentions may be lost in translation.  If you’re not set on living on the beach because driving 20 minutes to the beach isn’t a big deal to you, Miami Lakes is a nice place to live. Next to that is the city of Hialeah, which is where you will find the best Cuban food.  There are many generations of Cubans who live in Hialeah, but it is a working class town with very down to earth people.  If you visit the same window at the same Cuban restaurant (there are many) and do not speak Spanish, the girls will make the effort to speak English to you.  Lots of families and family owned small businesses still exist there, which contributes to the all around warmer vibe of the suburb.  Then you hit places like Coral Gables - more white collar - and you run into your fair share of snobs.  I think once people from any where get their hands on money, or come from money, something sets in where they feel they are above other people.  I just came from Boston where I met some of the rudest people ever. I realized, however, that many of them were yuppies and very cliquish.  Most people there were cut and dry, and polite behavior was hardly, if ever, reciprocated.  There was one particular cab driver who was very kind, though.  This was the same cab driver who scoffed at another one of his fellow Bostonians for trying to eject us out of his cab for $100.  Interestingly enough, this is the same cab that a group of New Yorkers hailed for us - not Bostonians.  That’s a whole other story. Anyway, the Boston, Mass accent suddenly became endearing as the cabbie was telling us where to visit that was close to the hotel we were staying at.  He was a very nice man.  Maybe if I had hit a Boston suburb I would have found friendlier Bostonians.  Either way, the more I visit outside of Miami, the happier I am to live here.

Posted on 11/15/2011 at 12:15 PM

Peter says:

what part of dc did you even visit? I live on the border between dc and arlington and I have never seen the government running the town.

Posted on 09/12/2012 at 6:14 PM

G says:

Why living in Miami is like being dead, or having a death wish.  I’ll let you come visit and see for yourself…  No Forget it, just take my advice and stay away!  I was born and raised here, and things aren’t getting better.  No jobs, ignorant people, especially the news media who make up their own stories to report, that are not very important, and a massive amount of corruption.

Posted on 09/23/2012 at 11:21 PM

s says:

compare miami to texas cities please

Posted on 11/13/2012 at 3:27 PM

Ellie says:

Matt and MierdaCubana I agree with both of you completely, but after living in New York City and Miami I am starting to think New York City is worse. The only good thing about Miami are the beaches and weather that makes it Paradise. I think tutu or whatever his name is a racist because it is usually the first thing that comes out of their mouths when they don’t like what other people say. Miami is full of rude Cubans; I have worked with some of them and known some that were nice but it is that and if you are not Cuban you will not get anywhere or anything in Miami. There is also prositution in NYC and it can get more gross when you see a fat old white guy with a 17 years old chinese girl crossing the street. The only thing Cubans and some white guys warned me about New Yorker’s being spoiled SOB’s and they were right about one thing.  Both Miami and New York City suk because they are completely ghetto, but I think maybe NYC a bit more ghetto than Miami. Cubans are very ethnocentric, but I have found that Italians and Jews in NYC are also very ethnocentric. What is weird is I never had a problem with Jews in Miami. It wasn’t until I moved to New York City and had to deal with these @##$@.  One more thing is if you are white and American I would not live in either city because you will be treated like the worse piece of crap, but especially NYC because they have very strict affirmative action rules that even go beyond what goes on in Miami. Neither city is worth it if you can’t have a decent life.

Posted on 11/23/2012 at 11:32 PM

DesieTee says:

@ My 2 Cents - finally someone found the words I’ve been struggling to come up with. But the good thing is that I live on Brickell Key and hang out in Mary Brickell Village, Palmetto Bay, Coconut Grove, Key Biscayne & Broward County. Only venture onto Miami Bch when friends visit. I refused to visit my longtime friend who lived over there. She has now moved to Coconut Grove because she too became tired of the vacuousness of life on SOBE ...just saying!

Posted on 11/25/2012 at 8:22 AM

Greg says:

Miami Fl. stinks, to many racists here who speak Spanish, and if you don’t look Spanish, or are not wealthy, or don’t know someone who owns a business you’ll never find work here.

Posted on 12/08/2012 at 11:59 PM

Michael says:

I lived in Coral Gables (1 year) Miami Beach (2 years) NYC (10 years). You’ll only be happy in any of these cities if you simply appreciate the good moments in that city and minimize the not so good. For example, driving over the causeway with the warm sun through my sunroof on a January day in Miami made me feel good; walking in NY’s Central Park on a snowy day in January also made me feel good; hanging around the Hamptons for the weekend made me feel good; driving down to Key West for the weekend made me feel good; other good times: engaging in intelligent political banter in a NY diner with a complete stranger who happens to be a UN diplomat, eating gelato and sipping cappuccino on Lincoln Road, catching an off-broadway or comedy show in the west village on a whim, jogging along south beach seeing the sunrise and swimming to start your day, feeling the electric pace of walking manhattan sidewalks on Friday night to start the weekend, sipping a cold beer poolside at the Delano next to hot models, sipping a cold beer at the Tribeca Grand next to hot models etc. etc.  Both cities will bring you treasurable moments. Carpe diem!

Posted on 02/19/2014 at 10:56 PM

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